The loss not everyone will understand

I have been a dog person all my life. We have had Westies (West Highland White Terriers) as adopted family members ever since we discovered that this was the only type of dog my mother wasn't afraid of.

For my bar mitzvah, my parents bought me a Westie after our Sherry died. I had Arri for 15 years and then had a 20 year hiatus of not having a dog.
My wife never had a pet and was very much against getting a dog. On three different occasions, she agreed for me to get a Westie and then took back her agreement. A dog, unlike so many other types of pets has an incredible impact on the lives of everyone in a house - going away for the weekend or longer, walking it, feeding it, barking, sickness, etc - so bringing in a dog without her agreement would be a recipe for disaster. I learned that many years ago when my father did that. My mother left the house and, in no uncertain terms, told my father that it was either the dog or her. The dog went.

My younger daughter loved all things that had to do with dogs: dolls, pictures, TV cartoons, toys. She was a finger sucker, not a thumb sucker. She sucked all of her fingers, going up and down the digits. The only time she didn't have a finger in her mouth was when she was eating. My wife read about the damage to the jaw and teeth that prolonged finger sucking could do and got very nervous. So, unbeknownst to me, one day while I was at work, she asked my daughter if she would stop sucking her fingers if we got a dog. That day she stopped. Hallelujah, my wife made a promise to my young daughter that she couldn't take back, so the next day I called my parents and asked them to find a Westie puppy to bring with them on their next visit to us in Israel which was about 2 months away.
Katy quickly became an integral part of our lives. She was very small for the breed which is a relatively small breed to begin with, but this was quite appropriate as my daughter was also very small (turns out she had a growth hormone deficiency and went on growth hormone shots for over 7 years). Katy is a member of our family. She greets us when we open the door and is genuinely happy to see us. She cuddles with us when we sit and watch TV and she sleeps in my daughter's bed. When we go on vacation, she stays by friends and upon our return to home before we pick her up, the house feels empty. There is something so strong that is missing and before we start unpacking, we go to get her to fill our home with her warmth.

Well, Katy is getting on in years and is not very active. I read and talked to a number of people about bringing a puppy home to rejuvenate our aging Katy. So we brought Krembo from a Westie breeder in Romania. Krembo was over 4 months old when she joined our family and was already bigger than Katy. At first, Katy rejected her as she was the queen of our home for so many years and this young interloper just came in to her kingdom. It took a couple of weeks but Katy and Krembo became great friends, loving adopted sisters. Krembo started playing with Katy like puppies play, biting each other in fun and jumping on each other. Katy felt attacked and then started playing along. Having a puppy in the house truly brought new life to our Katy. Krembo was like a sip from the fountain of youth for her. And this has been our story for the past 2+ years. For the first time in my life, I had 2 dogs. It meant more work but it added a new dimension in our lives. Krembo was full of life, jumping over Katy, getting into trouble (in a fun way) and making us laugh so much.

These pets become so much more than that. They become part of us. We cannot think of coming home and not having them greet us. After a bath, when they are both so clean and white, we can't stop petting them and taking pictures of them together, every single time. We take them out for a walk before going to bed no matter how tired we are and want them to do their business as fast as possible, but it has become a routine that is ingrained in our lifestyle.
And then one gets sick. She is just like another child. You worry about her and want her to get well. You can't stand to see that she isn't eating, nor drinking. You take her to the vet who thinks it may be either a stomach virus or a reaction to some of the junk she constantly eats in the garden. On day 4 of not eating, the vet gives her intravenous fluids. She can manage not eating for these days but she is at risk of dehydration. On day 5, the vet does a blood test, gives more fluids and other meds. On day 6, he gets the blood tests results and tells us to get her to the veterinary hospital as soon as possible. There is a major problem with her kidneys.
We were supposed to have guests for dinner that night but our puppy's health is the most important thing. My daughter and I drive the 45 minutes to the hospital and after a while we are taken in for her to be examined. We go to the ultrasound and the vet says that she has virtually no kidneys. It is a birth defect where the kidneys don't develop. They say there is no hope as the toxin levels in her blood are so high and the kidneys, the little bit that she has are not doing their job. We talk to our vet who says that we should have a consult with the vet on staff who is a specialist in nephrology, but it is Friday night and everyone is at home having friday night dinner with their families. So we leave Krembo there to get fluids and have another, more in depth ultrasound by the radiologist they have to call in so the specialist can see all of the pictures of her kidneys. We go home and later get a call from the specialist who also tells us there is nothing to do. They can give her fluids and meds to try to reverse this crisis a bit but it won't last long and in a matter of days, maybe weeks, she will cycle into this same crisis situation.

In the morning, I call the hospital to see if there was any change for the better but there was not. As a family, we decide to bring her home to spend a little time with her and say our goodbyes. I speak to our vet and tell him the situation. He has been wonderful, very supportive and will do whatever we need. We bring our Krembo home and put Katy next to her and we take turns sitting next to them both, petting them, kissing them and telling them both how much we love them.
I arrange with our vet that I will bring Krembo at 2:30pm and after a painful farewell full of tears and crying, I take Krembo out of our home for the last time.

At the vet, I place her on the examining table, petting her non stop and just look into her eyes. The vet connect her to fluids and gives her a shot of medicine which is to relax her, although in her sick state, she was already calm and without much strength, but I'm sure the shot gave here a bit of a buzz to make her feel a little bit better after these last days. The next meds were to put her into a sleep state and then the med to stop her heart. 

Krembo quickly crept into our hearts and was a member of our family. She was the little sister. I know that people who don't have dogs or have never had family pets will have no understanding of these concepts. For them it's just a dog. I can't fault them. It's just beyond their realm of experiences so I don't expect them to commiserate or be able to have empathy. They can definitely have sympathy to a certain degree but that is as far as it gets. It OK. But for those who also have allowed their family pets to enter their lives, they will understand exactly what we are feeling.

Krembo was so very sweet, funny, loving and loved. We hurt and we miss her. She will forever be in our hearts.